Stand By My Friend
by Laheara
Summary: (Master and Commander - The Far Side of the World movie) Lucky Jack's thoughts from the movie on paper to Sophie.


Title: Stand By My Friend Author: Laheara (entsg1efc2002@yahoo.ca) Fandom: Master and Commander movieverse Rating: PG to be safe Summary: Jack's thoughts of the movie on paper. Disclaimer: Patrick O'Brian created a wonderful world with his series and I'm very pleased it's been recognized in a movie. It would be great if they did some more of the books, as this one was amazing. I don't own these characters, they are all his and now also the movie companies.  
  
Dear Sophie,  
  
I know I haven't written to you in some time now and I apologize. Our previous mission has taken a great deal of my time and there have been many things to plan for. My heart as always is with you and I miss you terribly. With this mission now complete I should think we shall be returning to England soon, perhaps soon I will be in your presence again. I look forward to such a time and until then I will dream of you.  
  
We won the ship and I made Tom a very happy man. I promoted him to Captain and gave him the new ship; he was so shocked at first he didn't even move. When it finally sunk in he was nothing but smiles as the men cheered for him during his departure for his first command. I wish him luck and hope he takes care, he has been a wonderful First Lieutenant and I shall miss him even though I am very happy for him. We have been together for a long time Tom and I, and it will seem different here without him at my side in the coming battles.  
  
I would like to say that everything is going well now with us having taken the prize of this great French ship but it is not. I've done it again I'm afraid. I've let my ridiculous temper get the better of me and done something I'm not proud of. I regret to admit that I have once again injured Stephen with a careless remark. I called his love of the natural world a "hobby" and said we did not have time for it during my mission.  
  
I regretted the words the moment I saw the hurt and shock in his eyes. At first it appeared he would come back with some witty remark and make me laugh and we would both forget all about it, but I was mistaken. He simply turned, lowered his head, and walked away. I wanted with all my heart to go after him and tell him I was sorry but of course my old friend pride prevented me from do so. And to add to my run of bad luck Stephen was shot not five feet from me on the quarterdeck as he was following an albatross across our deck. He was even shot by one of our own, Mr. Howard. The Marine was more scared then I had ever seen him when Stephen collapsed.  
  
Earlier Stephen had told me that continuing my chase of this faster, heavier ship with twice our guns was nothing but pride. Part of me agreed with him but the majority would not and called him on it saying I was following my orders, even though I had already surpassed my orders weeks ago. I told him I would follow my orders and there was nothing that would stop me. He looked straight at me and asked, "no matter the cost" and I said yes "no matter the cost".  
  
I don't believe I truly knew my own mind when I said that. I believed it at the time I said it, but when I saw Stephen so pale and knowing how much pain he was in all I could think of was helping him. He was so fascinated with the Galapagos Islands I turned the ship around and headed back there. His surgeon's aid said it best for the procedure to be done on dry land and even after we thought we spotted the French ship again it just didn't interest me any longer. Tom asked me if we should beat to quarters and all I could think was, "no, who will care for our injured with Stephen with a below a bullet in his side".  
  
I sat in my quarters and stared at Stephen's cello for nearly an hour agonizing over my choice. My call to save my ship had already cost the life of a good man, and I wasn't about to loose my best friend also. I have seen death; in my world it is something that runs parallel with us always. At that moment all I could think was, "no, I will not loose Stephen, not like this". I know my choice must have seemed very personal to the men but none would word their displeasure with me openly, plus they also care a great deal for Maturin. I guess "no matter the cost" doesn't apply to my best friend being shot and needing surgery on dry land.  
  
Since that, Stephen has recovered nicely. He still holds his side a from time to time; he says the wound was deep and will take some time still to properly heal. I find myself checking up on him at night regularly, seeing that he is caring for his own wound with the same expert hand he uses on my crew and myself.  
  
Ah Sophie, I don't know. Stephen is the only person I know that can get under my skin so deeply. He is the only person who can make me say and do things I would never in the company of others. I supposed it's because I trust him so completely and know he will not be coy with my when I ask him opinion, even if I do not agree with him. We have been through a great deal since meetings that day during the concert, and I really cannot imagine my life without him in it. He is my best friend, my sounding board, and my comfort when, as Captain, I am forced to make hard decisions that pain me.  
  
I stand by my decision to turn back and in doing we were in the right place to take the prize and the crew were thrilled. Stephen received several more days of wondering around the island collecting beetles and other strange creatures like that stick-looking bug.  
  
Alas, I must now go. I have been informed I am needed above deck. I will endeavour to write again soon and get this mailed as soon as possible. Thank you for listening as you always do.  
  
Yours always,  
  
Jack 


End file.
